Managing with Emotional Intelligence

People have feelings

People hurt. They bleed. They are not like stones, they feel. The words we say and our actions towards them can make or break their spirits. It is important that we treat them with a lot of empathy.


In management, as in parenting, we directly influence not only our immediate subordinates or children, but an entire generation of people, some of whom will be managers and parents in the future. It is both the manager and parent’s responsibility to lead with intelligence.

Bringing your problems from home to work or from work to home is not a beautiful thing to do.

Research has proved that managers or parents who lack emotional balance produce poor results at work and cannot run their families properly. Those with a higher emotional balance can easily help their subordinates to perform 50%-60% better.

Getting the work done

How an employee performs depends on how they feel about the job, the workplace and the manager. The manager can easily help an employee to enjoy their work by bringing in a feel good factor to the workplace. I’ve watched average soccer teams raise their game and win matches because they play for the manager. Employees will put in an extra hour or two just because they feel good about the workplace and the manager. An entire company can benefit from such positive energy. That same employee will go home in high spirits and love their time with the family while looking forward to another day at work. As a manager you would have managed to keep the employee healthy and stress free ensuring more hours at work as well as stability at home.

What’s the point?

When you manage people you’ve got to know your strengths and weaknesses. You’ve got to know yourself. Ask yourself the hard questions like Am I fair? Am I racist? Does it really show? Am I blatantly racist? Do I favor boys more that girls? Am I tribalist? Should I really be practicing these archaic tendencies? How does my behavior affect the performance of my staff?

When you answer these questions objectively, you are on the way towards knowing yourself and then you can find ways of improving your attitude to become not only a better manager but a better person.

People see, people feel

We must always bear in mind that our actions, our words and indeed our attitude towards people can affect their performance at work. We need to get into the business of uplifting each other. We need to affirm one another. We must desist from abusing our powers. We need to practice fairness always. We need to give genuine praise where praise is due. They say praise to a human being is what sunshine and water are to a flower!

Let’s put smiles on each other’s faces. It is possible.IMG_8545

  • sandrasibanda

    Mmmm, interesting! The problem with things like tribalism, racism and feminism is that usually the people who practice these don’t know that they do. Covert or unintentional racism – the racism that is subtle. At times one can tell that the person they’re dealing with is not even aware that they’ve just made a racist move … or is it that they think the other party is so dull that they don’t see it?

    • sandrasibanda

      The most important thing is that we’ve got to be self aware. We’ve got to really understand ourselves by getting in tune with our emotions. If you’re not aware that what you’re saying or doing is causing discomfort to others around you means that you are not in tune with you emotions. One has to really take a conscious decision to know themselves and then work towards rectifying or balancing their emotions. It’s a skill that needs to be practiced consciously. Nkosi Sibanda